Respect Is Being Seen, Not Fed

At nearly every ESOP conference we attend, someone takes the stage to talk about empowering employee-owners. A CEO recently asked us to help him improve employee engagement scores. When we asked what he had already tried, he listed town halls, barbecues, Thanksgiving turkeys, birthday celebrations. All well-intentioned. But all fell short. “We do all the right things,” he said. “Why doesn't it feel like enough in our engagement scores? How do I empower my people more?”

Empowerment matters. We believe that the three pillars of empowerment include authority, responsibility, and accountability. We will talk about these pillars in our next letter.

But there is a fourth pillar that rarely makes the agenda.

Respect.

Not the overused slogan in the corporate world. The act.

 Many leaders define respect as being able to "walk in someone else's shoes." It sounds right. It feels generous. And in ESOP companies, particularly those where the founding owner remains as the CEO or Board Chair, it often translates into turkeys at Thanksgiving, summer barbecues, or monthly birthday celebrations. You get the drift.

 These things are good. But they are not respect. They may be even signs of paternalistic leadership. "I know what's best for you" is not respect. It is affection without curiosity. And affection without curiosity is not enough.

 Here's the truth about walking in someone else's shoes. You cannot do it. Not really. To truly walk in a floor operator's shoes, you would need to do their job for a long time to develop carpal tunnel syndrome or shoulder strain, live in their home, and sit at their dinner table. Anything short of that is imagination dressed up as empathy. And when leaders confuse the two, they drift toward paternalism that shows up as "I know what's best for you.” This is the opposite of ownership culture.

So what is real respect?

Real respect is making people seen and making them feel like they matter. 

Think of it like a spotlight in a dark theater. Most organizations illuminate only the stage that includes the senior leaders, the big deals, the quarterly results. Real respect means turning that spotlight toward every corner of the building. The engineer solving a problem nobody else noticed. The operator whose precision prevents a defect that would have cost the company thousands. The janitor whose attention to detail signals to every customer that this company cares about everything it touches.

We watched one CEO do this consistently. Every week, without fail, he would find someone in the company, regardless of title or seniority, observe what they did, understand why it mattered, and then tell the whole company about it. Not in a generic "shoutout" way. In specific, detailed, genuine terms that made the person feel truly seen. The result? 92% score on "I feel valued and respected" in company surveys. Not because of barbecues. Because people felt their leader took time to understand their work, amplified it to the entire organization, and connected it to the company's mission.

That is respect.

And in an ESOP, where every employee-owner's engagement directly affects stock price, it is also strategy.

 Here is your action to consider for this week.

 Find one person in your company. Not a manager, not a senior leader. Someone whose work happens quietly, away from the boardroom. Spend thirty minutes understanding exactly what they do and why it matters. Then tell the whole company about it. Even minute details that show you really listened such as describing the eye strain at the end of the shift for a quality inspector who inspects hundreds of small parts per shift or acknowledging the exhaustion an operator feels while meeting daily production targets in a non air-conditioned production floor.

 Do it next week. And the week after.

 Watch what happens to your culture when people realize that ownership means being seen and not just being handed a free lunch.

 Authority, responsibility, and accountability make empowerment possible. Respect makes people want it. Without respect, empowerment is a process. With it, empowerment becomes a culture.